Monday, September 30, 2013

Interview with a two year old

Up and coming conversationalist and nap time procrastinator, Sebastian Thomas is here with us to share all about his life as a toddler.  In his trademark raspy voice he ends his thoughtful responses with a question-like emphasis that leaves the listener wondering if he is informing or retorting.  Sebastian is known for his one sided dimple, general playfulness and overt preference for his Daddy.  Join me in welcoming this young toddler to the bloggy blog scene:

Me- "Can you tell us what your name is?"
Bash-  "Uuuum, Bashy?"

Me- "Can you say Sebastian?"
Bash- "Uuuuum,  Piderman?"

Me- "How old are you?"
Bash-  "Uuuuuum, good."
Bash- "Uuuuuum, Bashy?"

Me-  "Are you two?"
Bash- "Uuummmm, I toot."

Me-  "Where is your belly button?"
Bash- (quickly points to belly, pulls shirt back down and rolls over) "Right dere.  Don't eat mine riblets!" 

Me- "I won't eat your riblets if you can you can give Mommy kisses?"
Bash- "You kiss mine dimples"
Me- "Can you point to your dimples?"
Bash (points to cheek)- "YOU give kisses"

Me- "Do you like playing give kisses?"
Bash- "Play 'get you!'"

Me- "Ooook, you better run or I'm gonna get you and give you kisses!"
Bash-  "Weeee who!!  Dats pun!!  Don't get me!"

Me- "I got you!!  Can we play questions some more before you go nigh night?"
Bash- "Uuuuummmm, no.  Not right now. You play trains right dere {points to floor}."

Me- "Do you like playing trains with Mommy or Daddy?" 
Bash-  "Uummmm Daddy.  Daddy at work?"

Me- "Yes, Daddy is at work right now.  Where's Enna?"
Bash- "Uuuummm,  at 'skool" 

Me- "That's right!  Where is Jonah?"
Bash- "Uuuuummm, on bus"

Me- "Where is Baby Sam?"
Bash-  "Uuuuummm,  Stam's sweeeping upstairs."

Me- "Who is your best friend?  Jonah?  Baby Sam?"
Bash-  "Uuuuummm,  no, Lelo.  Right dere."

Me- "Where is Bash?"
Bash-  "Uuuuummm,  right dere (points to his closet mirror)." 

Me- "What is your favorite snack?"
Bash- "Uuuuuum, Jooonah's 'nack."
Me- "What IS Jonah's snack?"
Bash- "Jonah eat it?"
Me- "Do you just like to eat whatever Jonah is eating?"
Bash- "Yeeeesh."

Me- "Can you sing the Itsy Bitsy Spider for me?"
Bash- "You ting itsy pider!  Me sit on you lap."
Me- "...The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spo-"
Bash- "Shhh.  NO TING!  'Top!  No ting!"
Me- "Can you sing it then?"
Bash-  "Uuummmm, you ting it.  Nicely."

Me- "What is your favorite movie?"
Bash- "I want watch moomie right now. You get moomie right dere!  Yet's watch Nee-no!!"
Me-  "It's not time to watch a movie right now, I just want to know what movies you like to watch when it's time to."
Bash-  "Watch Nee-no!!!  Bashy watch Nee-no!  Right now."
Bash-  "I want watch Nee-no"
Bash- "Neee-no!  Neee-no right dere!"
Me-  "Sorry Sweetie, we aren't watching shows right now.  You have to go take your nappies first."
Bash-  "You go take mine nappies."

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Burnt out like stale toast

I want to say I have no good excuse to be feeling a wee bit brunt out lately, but I actually do have a few excuses I could toss out there if you're really pushing me to hear them...

  1. The other responsible adult in this household has been working hours longer than a never ending road this entire month of September. 
  2. We're suffering post vacation excitement withdrawals times six (Yes, even Sam has them.  Yesterday he let me know he really misses being held by people all day long). 
  3. I have 4 children all 5 and under. 
  4. Three of them (Yes, even Sam) are extremely active boys. 
  5. The other child who is generally agreeable, thoughtful, likes napping and stays in one place long enough to photograph is perpetually over tired from being in all day kindergarten and is no longer any of the things I previously mentioned.  
  6. I realized I don't really enjoy two year olds, they're too moody, demanding and simply won't listen to reason (or anything I say for that matter). 
  7. Now that I'm not pregnant I'm back to being lactose intolerant, which means I have no where worthy to turn to when I feel like eating my stress away.  
  8. I've still been eating my stress away and now my tummy hurts all the time and I look 6 months pregnant by the end of the day.  
  9. I can't locate my living room under the waiting-to-never-get-folded laundry pile up from our trip, several nights of diaper removing and the 4 daily clothing changes from Drulio Down by the School Yard.  
  10. One or more of my Prince Charmings keeps leaving me love notes scribbled onto expensive objects around our house and popping the keys off my work computer.

None of this is actually new.  It's all in the job description in one form or another, but I haven't had a day off in far too long and while the benefits are pretty good in this role, the pay is lousy and the health hazards take a toll.   In fact, since my first day I've notice my hair is falling out in clumps, I have lines on my face that aren't going away and people avoid me in public places like I have leprosy.

Most days I shrug it all off the overburdened shoulders and focus on my sincere gratitude for the gift of motherhood (because it is there even on days like today).  But every once in a while when I go to scream into my pillow and it's covered with pen scribbles I think I just might explode.

But I don't.  And instead I just pray with a thousand pretty pleases that my husband does not have to work late again tonight.

And then thank the Good Lord for things like The Honest Toddler to ease the pain and put a smile back on my face for when real adults are around to talk to again:

"Anyway I wanted to thank you for changing my pajamas and throwing that towel down on my pee pee sheets. I noticed you didn’t open your eyes once (weird). It’s also OK that you didn’t actually change my sheets. I find the faint smell of ammonia comforting. Love means doing things halfway."

Saturday, September 21, 2013

What type of breast feeder do you have?

As a mother of four with more than 5 years of breastfeeding experience I've characterized the top 15 most common types of breast feeders.  
  1. The motor boater  /n/  small suckling that periodically buries, wipes, blows or nuzzles his or hear head into the mother's bosom while nursing.  
  2. The slapper /n/  small suckling that repeatedly slaps one breast while nursing from the other. 
  3. The pincher  /n/  small suckling that pinches, pokes or digs his or her nails into the mother's tender skin while nursing.
  4. The puller  /n/   small suckling that retains the mother's nipple in mouth while pulling back with brute force. 
  5. The head turner  /n/   small suckling that retains the mother's nipple in mouth while dramatically turning to look about his or her surroundings. 
  6. The angry boxer  /n/   aggressive suckling that periodically punches and hits at the mother's chest while nursing.
  7. The super soaker  /n/  small suckling who likes to grab the mother's lactating nipple during a feeding so that it will spray milk across the room. 
  8. The kicker  /n/   excited suckling that forcefully kicks and twists the torso and legs while nursing. 
  9. The snacker  /n/  small suckling who nurses in short enough increments to prolong and extend painful let downs.
  10. The straw slurper   /n/   small suckling whose latch resembles a grown human sucking a thick milkshake from a straw. 
  11. The talker  /n/  small suckling who likes to talk and smile while nursing so that the mother's milk may drip and escape from his or her mouth.  
  12. The hair dresser  /n/   small suckling who pulls out strands, clumps or sections of his or her mother's hair while nursing.  
  13. The all nighter  /n/  small suckling who prefers nursing any time the mother should be sleeping. 
  14. The sleeper  /n/  small suckling who frequently falls asleep while nursing and can often be caught moving his or her pursed lips while dreaming of nursing. 
  15. The lover   /n/   small suckling that gazes in awe and wonder at his or her mother's beloved face while nursing.  

*Babies have been known to change and/or combine breastfeeding type over the duration of his or her nursing lifetime.

**New techniques and styles are being created constantly to challenge the already more difficult than you probably realized process of breastfeeding your newborn.  

If you have experienced a style not represented above, please let me know!

Friday, September 20, 2013

7 Quick Takes Friday Vol 22

These better be legitimate quick takes this week, so I'm a gonna time myself.  Ready, set, GO!

We got back super late Monday night from my sister's wedding in Wyoming so exhausted from the truly epic journey traveling back that I was sure all of my kids would sleep in Tuesday morning.  By 7:00 am all 4 weary travelers were up and ready to play with their toys that they missed like the dessert misses the rain.  The night before I had decided to keep them home from school an extra day so they could sleep in apparently just to play with their estranged toys.  "Oh well" was my original thought, but much to my pride by 9:30, both kids had asked if they could go to school now.  Jonah said he missed riding his bus.  Sienna said she missed her friends and didn't want them to do show and tell without her because she had so much to tell about.  So I kicked my dark circled babies out the door and off to school with only a few hours of sleep.  I have to say it did pay off later that night when everyone was asleep 45 minutes early and to my knowledge they held it together during school.

I think I have post-vacay depression.  Actually, it's worse than that.  It was a vacation and my sister's wedding.  Two majorly anticipated, over-planned and hyped up events that came and went almost just as fast as my own wedding!  Every day since getting home it's been the same sad scene:

I've woken up and it's still hot out.
There aren't any wild horses eating grass outside my window.
I'm not living in a cozy log cabin at the foot of a mountain.
And most depressingly of all nobody, not one kind person has offered to make me whatever I wanted for breakfast.

There were definitely less romantic sides to the trip.  Like me trying to haul my 4 children and all of our excessive baggage through three different airports, two different shuttles and two different vehicles without my husband all in one day.  I was stressed out just thinking of it for weeks before we left.  By the grace of God and for their own longevity in this world, all four of the kids really had excellent behavior.  There were no melt downs.  Relatively conveniently timed potty trips.  They all stayed close to the stroller at all times and were generally content sitting quietly waiting at all the stops (not without plug in to various iNanny devices of course, but hey, whatever works works for me!).  I think they were so excited to be going on such a big trip, they didn't dare test any potential "we are going straight back home" threats.

#4 made their behavior seem self-imposed... so to set that all straight, the fine workings of the gigantic family traveling without Daddy machine would not have ran so smoothy without a substitute engineer.  And so... I would like to dedicate an entire Take thanking my baby brother (who is an actual engineer) (and who doesn't read this blog) for all his help on the trip!  You entertained my wildest of the wilds.  You kept an extra eye on the stragglers.  You were firm, yet fun.
You were the best uncle ever!  Emphasis on the UNCLE for the two different people who assumed he was my husband.  He, being my baby brother who is only 22 and looks a half birthday above 18.  Not only did he provide me with treasured camaraderie, but also was almost as good as having daddy with us whenever he was around.

Thanks for the help Brudder!

Sienna also found her treasured camaraderie on the trip.  My new brother-in-law has a niece Sienna's age who was also a flower girl and a fast best friend!

These two were adorable beyond words throwing the flowers down the isle.  We all forgot about flower girl baskets, so we had to scramble for one for them to share at the last minute.  I think that actually turned out even cuter.  They giggled and clung to each other the entire walk to the front.  I don't think there was a smileless face in the crowd watching them not just toss, but literally chuck bunches of petals at people as they walked by.  Sorry for the blurry picture, but it was all I could find. Hopefully someone caught it on video and I'll share it later.

Well shoot, that wasn't fast at all.  I'm terrible at the Quick part of this game....  How about I just dump some of my random favorite iphone pics on you as a quick wrap up?

Happy baby

Happy Bash

Happy Jonah Vader

Happy Sienna 

We found me a younger model, just in case! 

How life was meant to be....

Realities of sharing one hotel for a family of 6

Realities of entertaining a two year old on an airplane...

Head on over to Jen!

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Froggy went a courtin'

Froggy went a courtin' and he did ride
with a sword a pistol by his side (all the right moves)
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

He rode right up to Miss Mousey's door, uh, huh
He rode right up to Miss Mousey's door, uh, huh
He rode right up to Miss Mousey's door
gave three loud raps and very big roar (which were actually from their adorable dogs)
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

Said, "Miss Mouse, are you within?", uh, huh
Said he, "Miss Mouse, are you within?", uh, huh
Said, "Miss Mouse, are you within?"
"Yes, kind sir, I sit and spin" (He was taking too long to purpose)
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

He took Miss Mousey on his knee (grabbed her in his arms, because knee is weird), uh, huh
Took Miss Mousey on his knee, uh, huh 
Took Miss Mousey on his knee, uh, huh
Said, "Miss Mousey, will you marry me?" (WAHOO!)
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

Without my uncle Rat's consent (I'm Uncle Rat, or so I like to think), uh, huh

Without my uncle Rat's consent, uh, huh
Without my uncle Rat's consent
I wouldn't marry the President
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

Uncle Rat laughed and he shook his fat sides (Sadly, this is still true to the analogy), uh, huh
Uncle Rat laughed and he shook his fat sides, uh, huh
Uncle Rat laughed and he shook his fat sides
To think his niece her sister would be a bride
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

Uncle Rat went a runnin' to downtown, uh, huh

Uncle Rat went a runnin' to downtown, uh, huh
Uncle Rat went a runnin' to downtown
To buy his niece a wedding gown (she bought her own gown, 3 of them to be exact!)

Where shall the wedding supper be? uh, huh

Where shall the wedding supper be? uh, huh
Where shall the wedding supper be?
Way down yonder in a hollow tree
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

What kind of weather did we see? Uh, huh.
What kind of weather did we see? Uh, huh.
What kind of weather did we see?
Pourin' rain and a little freeze
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh 

We said ain't no rain gonna bother me! uh, huh
We said ain't no rain gonna bother me! uh, huh
We said ain't no rain gonna bother me
And sent two little neices tossing some leaves
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

We were all warm cause boots had we, uh, huh
We were all warm cause boots had we, uh, huh
We were all warm cause boots had we
like the cowboys we pretend to be
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

First weddin' kiss was stole by me, uh, huh
First weddin' kiss was stole by me, uh, huh
First weddin' kiss was stole by me
'cuz I can't resist my man in a vest 
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

Now after that weddin' a toast we need, uh huh
Now after that weddin' a toast we need, uh, huh
Now after that weddin' a toast we need
With some beer and flutes and a trusty steed 
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

With some liquid courage we were ready to dance, uh, huh
With some liquid courage we were ready to dance, uh, huh
With some liquid courage we were ready to dance
So they started us off with sweet romance 
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh 

Next for a spin was the bride and dad, uh, huh
Next for a spin was the bride and dad, uh, huh
Next for a spin was the bride and dad
They planned something too, and boy we're glad!
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

The very next day we went for a ride, uh, huh

The very next day we went for a ride, uh, huh
The very next day we went for a ride
Some of us wearing our naked rawhides 
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh
(I took this picture, so please ask first and give me credit if you use it)
Welcome Uncle Froggy we love you so, uh, huh
Welcome Uncle Froggy we love you so, uh, huh
Welcome Uncle Froggy we love you so
I'm sure you'll make a fine new bro
uh, huh, uh, huh, uh, huh

We wish the very best to my baby sister and her forever man!  May the blessings flow to you like the rain on your perfect day! 

Friday, September 6, 2013

7 Quick Takes Vol 21

I'm back... I feel like this 7 Quick Takes needs a slow motion run to go with it.... it's been so long since I've joined Jen


I'm not the same mother I was when I last joined in the 7QTFs.  I have since seen things that can never been unseen.  I have learned things that can never been unlearned.   I have felt things that can never be unfelt.   I have been home alone all calm and relaxing morning long with two easy going, mostly quiet babies who take early naps.  

It's been every bit as glorious as that sounds! 

But the flip side is when I've got a full team at home, I'm too out of shape to play ball (and they know it....) 


But, like everything, out of sight, out of mind, so instead of worrying about the chaos awaiting me at 2:45 every day I'm just blissfully enjoying my slow time and soaking up every second I can with this rapidly growing little love and his still young enough to be adorably naughty big brother.


It's funny how we maybe just I am only now after having a bundle of kids learning how best to savor every moment of my babies when they're babies.  I think it's because I seemed to have had endless time to lay around and stare at  my first or maybe even second borns that I somehow actually missed the right moments to hold onto. 

It's not watching how they looked when they sleep that I'll miss.  Or even that delicious baby smell that should be bottled up forever.  Or the way their little toes spread apart when they sleep.  I'll never understand why my father in law doesn't love that. It's my favorite! 

I think it's just them being babies that goes by too fast.  And it's my own darn fault!  With Sienna I used to literally just lay next to her and watch her sleep for more time than I'm willing to pen and I suppose I don't really miss that time.  That imagine is imprinted deep in my heart forever.  But what I also have imprinted next to the sweet smell of her baby skin and the way her lips pursed when she slept is knowing how anxiously I awaited and looked for each milestone to come.  I practically coached her into rolling over.   We couldn't wait for her to crawl and walk.  We used to practice her walking, so she'd pick up on it faster.  

So I'm wising up like I did with Bash and I'm going to savor every moment of both of them being a baby by letting them be one for as long as I possibly can.   At 28 months old the big kids were practically walking off to college, but not with Bash.  For some reason I still feel like he is still my little baby too.  And so, I'm going to keep cherishing my time having my two little babies to snuggle and play with all day.  


Ok, even though I just said all that I have to admit, if there were ever a baby stage I'm tempted to hurry along it's teething.... 

We've got it bad, folks!  Real bad.  Flash flood warnings have been called on his drooling and any thunder would be surely masked by his fussing.   


Speaking of not hurrying things along, this week I've also felt acutely aware of the ways that having a big family means we all get to practice being patient all day long.  Let's go through the few virtue opportunities we had just yesterday:
  • Be patient, I'm busy changing your brother's bedsheets, because he somehow snuck a sippy cut into his crib last night and soaked his diaper all the way through to the mattress protecter.  I'll get your breakfast ready in a minute. 
  • Be patient, we cannot play with the train set that you're so quietly occupied with, because we have to rush out the door to get the big kids to school on time.  
  • Be patient, Mommy has to load and buckle all 3 of your other siblings into their many point harness car seats while crawling around a tightly packed and suffocatingly hot minivan before the air conditioner will start working strong enough to make a difference.  
  • Be patient, your sister is taking 20 years to take an epic poo in the public restroom while we alllll wait outside her stall and try desperately to keep the toddlers from drinking the toilet water.   
  • Be patient, we cannot run off to play on the tantalizing park swing set because we all have to stop and wait while I discipline your brother who is refusing to put on his shoes and therefore keeping us waiting in the blazing sun.  
  • Be patient, I can't answer your 1000th previously answered question, because Mommy is putting herself in time out for a few minutes because she is far to hot, sweaty and cranky to do anything else.  


It actually hasn't been as stressful as #5 might lead you to believe, but it has been HOT.  Everything is crankier when it's hot.  And after all my mushy baby loving in #4, I wanted to be honest with you. 


You know what hot means.... crickets.   We have crickets sneaking into our garage to escape the heat (I imagine), which our kids think is as good as an Easter egg hunt!  

"Mom!  We go to bed at night and when we wake up early in the morning the crickets are there waiting for us to find them!!"

Oh goody gumdrops! 

Granted, I've never been a little boy, but I simply do not understand the fascination with all things creepy crawly.  Even Sienna's been hit by the cupid of bug loving.  Currently, their favorite game is to catch them and let them escape in the house and watch them squirm off to hide under our couch.

The perk to this is that Bash is becoming quite the aspiring entomologist.

He can name all sorts of different kinds of nasty things.   Bee.  Pider.  Daddy Leg Pider.  Ant.  Cricked.  Fy.  Bit-you-bug. Bit-you-pider.  Yady bug.  Icky bug.   Geen gass bug.  

I can see it now... sorry Mrs. Future Preschool Teacher, he doesn't know his colors, but do you have an insect book he can read to the class?

So that's what we've been up to lately!  What about you?

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Straight Talk With Sienna Vol 3

Watching the boys run all around the house in their super hero capes after a bath...
Sienna:  "Can I have ear drops?"
Me:  "You don't seem sick, you don't need drops. I don't think you have an ear ache, Sweetie."
Sienna:  "Yes, I do!  They boys keep screaming so loud it's givin' me an ear infection."

Watching Daddy cut his hair in our bathroom...
Sienna:  "Daddy has a little gray hair, but you can't see it when he cuts it short. But you can see your freckles anytime."

Trying to console me after her previous comment...
Sienna:  "I know another difference between you and daddy!  Your legs are fluffy and his are muscly"

Holding the little parakeets at the aquarium...
Sienna:  "Oh no Mom!  The birdie is looking for my milkoos!" 

Running late to school in the morning we get stuck behind the most clueless driver in the world who isn't turning on the left arrow...
Me:  "Come on... please!!  Go!!  It's green!"
Sienna:  "Geez Mom, people should hornk their horns at her!"


In the car on the way home from school...
Sienna:  "Mom!  Did you know the devil is very mean and evil!!  He is happy when we do bad things, because he wants God to be sad."
Me:  "That's right, he's horrible. I hope I never have to meet him."
Sienna:  "What does he look like?!  Do you have picture of him?!" 
Me:  "No, I don't want any pictures of him!  He's too terrible." 
Sienna:  "I know!  We check on Facebook for some!"